The Last Laugh

See Satan standing by the gate
and some say that his name is hate

'Cos he's the bouncer of your soul
He'll bounce you all around the world

He'll lead you into mortal sin
He'll call to one and all come in

He'll promise that he loves you then
He'll say let's all go round again

But when you ask will Heaven wait
and if I die which one's the gate

The gate that leads to Heaven
or the gate that leads to Hell

----

Then he'll laugh and bear his teeth

He'll mutter swear words
underneath his breath

He'll vanish in the heat

And all you'll hear is the echo
of his evil spell

Where are you ?
Are you here or there ?

Where are you ?
Can't you tell ?

----

For Satan has the last laugh
the one that really counts

He'll weigh you on the scales
of justice by the pound and ounce

He'll cook you in the flames of Hell
He'll fry you till you're done

He'll serve you up
with some onions
in a burger bun

And when his demons come
to join his grisly barbecue

They'll wash you down with warm beer
and they'll raise a toast for you

They'll say thank God for all the sinners
who send us food to eat

May God be always with us now
'cos now our song's complete

----

But there's just one more chorus
which the demons love to sing

They'd sing the last words for us
if they knew where to begin

So God in Heaven save us
from the curse of mortal sin

The pearly gates will open
if the angels let us in

----

See Satan's standing by the gate
the gate that leads to Hell

But St. Peter's waiting for us
if we only ring the bell

He'll swing those gates wide open
and he'll greet us with a smile

Where are you ?
Are you here or there ?

Where are you ?
Can't you tell ?

You only have to live on Earth
and stay here for a while

----

You only have to live on Earth
and stay here for a while

And when you die
by God's good grace
you'll see St. Peter smile